Okay I am going to try to discuss my fears, some are logical and some are completely irrational, but none the less pretty scary in my mind. Okay I have to agree with Amanda that getting Cancer would be at the top of my list too! I have lost some very dear and near folks to me from that terrible disease, and its not pretty. When I was younger I have had a great fear of dying, and sometimes I still think about it and get kind of melancholy but not to the intensity I had as a child. I use to wake up from a cold sweat screaming “ I don't want to die”! And my mother had to soothe me back to sleep and say “its just a dream”! I do fear electrocution and believe this is how I am going to die, I despise electrical cords near a large body or water or a water source. It's a knowing I have, or perhaps it is how I died in one of my past lives. But I am paranoid about it!
Well today as an adult there are two things that really freak me out: 1.) Roaches and 2.) Lightning (you Southerners have the most fierce lightning this Northerner has ever seen, and Zeus, he don't play). The boyfriend's father calls me 'lightning bug', I hate the massive, mama jamma, palmetto bugs – aka - the big brown roaches common here … can I hear a yuck! When I use to live in Lakeland I would run up to pop's house (the boyfriend's dad) for the company cause your storms here are pretty fierce and well quite frankly is scary, exciting somewhat but very unnerving by oneself! Now lets talk about those damned palmetto bugs. What purpose do they serve! Yuck … and a big eeewwww! Spiders make me nervous but not like these giant roaches. I am not gonna lie to you Spiders make me really nervous, especially big hairy and colorful ones. Odd though if I had to, I would get close to snap a picture of a unique spider but would run like a chicken if it looked at me sideways. I'd scream like a lunatic as well! Snakes don't bother me, lately I have been really drawn to them and would like to make a few beaded necklaces with snake charms, They symbolize dreams and mysticisms to me … so I don't seem to worry too much about them. But let me try to hook their baby kindred folk to a fish-hook, the 'worm' and I will faint. Those wriggly little suckers...now they are friggin scary! Not to mention gross! Oh maggots well they are scary too! And disgusting!
I have smaller fears or lesser fears of being alone, dying alone, not making it financially, not being financially secure, being a disappointment to my family, not getting physically fit, not improving my own health and even letting myself down. Maybe these are worries but I am afraid of things like this happening and work hard to prevent them. I know I could do a better job at some of those things, and probably shouldn't worry about others. I am also scared of alligators and those red ants that hurt when they bite! I am petrified when the INTERNET is down. I would not know what I would do if I couldn't e-mail and more importantly blog! I may need a new modem soon so I have already arranged to go to my brothers in the event I loose my wireless connection so I can stay in this here WARP contest! LOL:)
Blessed Be ~ Bia' Aletheia
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